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Domestic Discipline Calendar

  The DD Calendar

This is the 7th article in this series that begins with >>>
>>>   "Where to Start: Beginning your DD Lifestyle Together"

DD Calendar: An ADDS Communication Tool

In the beginning of your DD lifestyle dynamic, or when starting to revitalize it with these ADDS tools and ideas, it's best to start slowly and work on one to two goals or behavioral changes at a time. In day to day life as your DD lifestyle grows there are going to be ...

In the beginning of your Domestic Discipline lifestyle dynamic, or when starting to revitalize it with these ADDS tools and ideas, it's best to start slowly and work on one to two goals or behavioral changes at a time. In day to day life as your DD lifestyle grows there are going to be a few more areas being worked on from the TiH List and HoH Rules. These areas will be worked on simultaneously.  Using a simple calendar is an easy way to look back and keep track of past transgressions and what the consequence was for that particular transgression.

When a mistake has been made and the appropriate Disciplinary Action, Aftercare and discussion afterward (detailing the consequence for a possible future transgression) is complete, then the TiH adds what Disciplinary Action was used on to the DD Calendar. 
I have seen TiHs use colors that correlate to the 5 categories of the HoH Rules and this works very well. Using designated colors on the DD Calendar is especially helpful in the future when looking back. Use whatever colors feel right to you. Even though the DD Calendar is kept privately with the DDiary and TiH list etc, it's not a bad idea to use abbreviations too. It's helpful later but not absolutely imperative.

Dishonesty (DisH)
Disobedience (DisB)
Disrespect (DisR)
Safety (Sty)
Health (Hlth)

It's extremely useful that each partner has an understanding of the The Tolerance LaDDer and Progression of Discipline. It's important for both partners to be aware of where in the Progression of Discipline the TiH is for each of their transgressions. It is imperative for the Disciplinary Action to fit the offense. When writing what consequence was administered on the DD Calendar, it's also helpful in the future and for privacy reasons to use the abbreviations used from these two communication tools.

Progression of Discipline /  Disciplinary Actions (DAs)

Keep in mind if it is a 1st. 2nd offense etc...
Warning/scolding (W)
Non Spanking Disciplinary Action (NSDA)
Spanking (Spk)
Disciplinary Spanking (DS)
Punishment Spanking (PS)

Tolerance LaDDer

Low, Mid or High
1 to 10 points of reference in each of the following DAs in the PoD
Spanking (Spk)
Disciplinary Spanking (DS)
Punishment Spanking (PM)

With this information in mind, it might look something like this on your DD Calendar:

2nd/DisR, 7ptDS, +NSDAs  (colors used here are just to reference this article more easily)

It's a quick simple addition to your DD Calendar. But in those few numbers and letters, there is a wealth of information that you and your partner understand. If you want to include what the NSDAs are or other information, and you are able to fit it in, then that's alright too. In the future there will be references to Maintenance Spanking (MS) etc... Either way, that information will be in the DDiary. 

When a misdeed or mistake happens and it has been a while since that particular transgression has occurred, the DD Calendar becomes a point of reference. The HoH will ask when was the last time this happened to decide what the next DA in the Progression of Discipline will be. Usually if it's something recent it's used as a reminder and the PoD moves up the Tolerance LaDDer. But when it has been some time since the last transgression  it helps the HoH decide if they will proceed upward or they may decide to repeat the last DA, or to use another set of DAs to correct the behavior. When it has been a long time and the TiH partner has been doing very well in that area, it should be taken into account and the HoH can decide to begin again at a lower level of the PoD and Tolerance LaDDer. Of course as always, it depends on what category from the HoH Rules this transgression is listed under.

This will become a useful communication tool and quick reference point for the HoH to use and the TiH to keep current.  I will reiterate from a past article, it is the TiHs responsibility to honestly and completely keep the ADDS Communication Tools current and up to date. So far, they include the TiH List, DDiary and DD Calendar.

The calendar type used for a DD Calendar can easily be found in many places. There might be one hanging on your wall right now! Just look for a basic calendar with open blocks where you can add your information. You can refer to the picture at the top of this article, or below,  for an idea of what is suggested.

This is the 7th article in this series. To begin with the first article in this series click > " Where to Start "   


  1. You have a very interesting blog; I've been spending some time reading all the posts. The one constuctive critism I would offer if I may is that there are way too many acronyms for everything and its confusing.

    Keep up the good work on the blog!

  2. Thank you for your kind comments and for being a friend and member of the site S! I appreciate the compliments and also any constructive ideas for improvement.
    So far, Everything here is information that has been developed over many years of living the DD lifestyle choice and the honor of Mentoring and Teaching others who live this lifestyle dynamic. I understood (19 days ago) when finally "officially" launching this site that there were a lot of things to learn and the blog format might pose some challenges. Those challenges would include a lot of ideas, tools and information being published quickly and chronologically in reverse and then having to copy write everything before posting etc, etc etc, the list goes on. But at the same time, once I began I didn't want to water the information down either. The information and tools in the series that begins with "Where to Start", that has kicked this site off, can take several months or up to a year to fully develop within a relationship. In that time I know that the discrestion of using new phrases and acronyms usually helps bring a couple closer together. It gives a little extra spring to the shared leap of faith they have decided to take with each other. And it's like they have their own secret language that only they share!
    My hope while writing the first series for this blog is to share my past experience with singles learning and couples beginning and adding to their relationships so they can use these tools and articles in their discussions. I hope readers will of course decide how to grow, move forward develop more ideas that they can bring back and share with all of us here. As those of you in a DD lifestyle choice understand, we are all growing and learning no matter how long we live this unique lifestyle. So, any new ideas or improvements on what is here are always welcome :)

  3. Anonymous11/07/2012

    I just finished reading all the Where to Start posts.
    Very informative and I wish the info here was around when we started.
    I'm still going to start over and follow along and implement everything mentioned to make my DD relationship even stronger. Rich


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