The Tolerance LaDDer

ADDS 30 points of Reference

A Pain Tolerance Communication Tool

The Tolerance LaDDer and the Progression of Discipline (PoD) go hand in hand. The Tolerance LaDDer is a pain tolerance communication tool... >>>>>

The Tolerance LaDDer and the Progression of Discipline (PoD) go hand in hand. The Tolerance LaDDer is a pain tolerance communication tool I came up with years ago while working with DD couples and single people learning about the DD lifestyle. I would ask a TiH partner what they thought their tolerance level might be and they might answer, "I have a high tolerance". Yet when I asked the HoH about their partners tolerance level I might hear, " Very low. They're reeling around during warm up" This is less of an exaggeration then you might think. Obviously for many people there was a gap in communication on the subject. They needed something to refer to that they both used as the same reference point.  Because of the importance of solid communication and safety, it was of the utmost importance for both people involved to be on the same page.. or in this case, the same Ladder! :)

In The Progression of Discipline, it is more easily understood how the Disciplinary Actions progress in nature and intensity as a TiHs goal is missed or a misbehavior is repeated. However, the communication of what each progression meant was more difficult. It is my hope that while each couple is different, this post will elicit discussion that aids in each couples understanding and something an individual can express when meeting someone who is also interested in Spanking and/or the DD lifestyle.

In the Progression of Discipline, Warm Up Spanking is not mentioned. Warm Ups are an important part of many couples and individuals spanking dynamic. It's more commonly discussed and should also be part of the discussion during Sit Down Discussions prior to a Disciplinary Action. In the ADDS philosophy of the DD lifestyle it's understood that Warm Ups are a pre Disciplinary Action, or not used when real discipline is needed. How each couple or individual use Warm Ups is up to them, their prior discussions or how the HoH sees the need at that moment depending on the situation. 
Non Spanking Disciplinary Action is also considered among the pre, added during or post disciplinary measures, but are non impact measures and therefore not included in the discussion of The Tolerance LaDDer. 

Disciplinary Actions (DA) include:

* Spanking
* Disciplinary Spanking
* Punishment Spanking 

  In the previous ADDS Blog installment of this series, it was mentioned that after a first misdeed there was the possibility of a "low end" Spanking. Here's where we'll begin the explanation of the Tolerance LaDDer. 

Imagine a straight ladder like the one seen in the image in this article. There are 10 rungs on the ladder and each will be used as a reference point. So, in essence there are 10 points of reference in the first Disciplinary Action that appears along the Progression Of Discipline. The first Disciplinary Action is called a Spanking. When discussing  a consequence beforehand for a particular transgression it's important that the HoH is clear and defined in the discussion, and also afterward when explaining what will happen next if the same misdeed occurs. A "low end" Spanking is considered near the bottom of the LaDDer. Depending on the situation a Spanking might be considered "low", "medium", or "high" end. Initially there is no need to get into what each rung or point on the LaDDer represents beforehand. That discussion will come after the Spanking and well after the Aftercare when the HoH and TiH are removed from the situation and are discussing how high up the LaDDer that Spanking was to them. A HoH might consider the Spanking that was recently applied as a "low" end Spanking while the TiH feels in their mind it was a "mid" to "high" end Spanking. The HoH might then ask, "I felt like it was about 4 points up the LaDDer. How many points do you feel it was?" Their answer might be, "I thought it was about 7 or 8"  This will begin to give them both a point of reference to the TiHs tolerance level in general, and also a point of reference to what the TiH should expect the next time the HoH says "low" end Spanking. With time and discussion there can be some adjustments made and the communication becomes more clear and defined in the discussions beforehand, the Warnings afterward, and in the TiHs general tolerance levels.

Imagine there are now three ladders. End to end reaching upward, one on top of the other. One representing the 10 points of reference on the Spanking LaDDer, one representing the 10 points on the Disciplinary Spanking LaDDer and one which represents the 10 points on the Punishment Spanking LaDDer. You now have 30 points of reference.
The next Disciplinary Action along the Progression of Discipline after a Spanking is a Disciplinary Spanking. So, when the Progression of Discipline has passed the "high" end, or 10 points up the Spanking LaDDer, that's where a "low" end or lower point Disciplinary Spanking begins. When the PoD has passed the "high" end or 10 points up the Disciplinary Spanking LaDDer, it is now progressed up to a "low" end or lower point Punishment Spanking.
And time for the TiH to reconsider the methods their using to correct behavior & avoid Punishment Spankings! :)

* You now have the combined ADDS 30 points of Reference when communicating, warning and discussing a Disciplinary Action or general tolerance level.  
Keep in mind that a persons tolerance level can change due to many factors, so keep the communication lines open and use these tools often. Also what one person considers a "mid" level Spanking, another might consider a "low" end Punishment Spanking. Open honest communication is the key to knowledge and understanding. 

If you're reading this with your partner, this might be a good time to stop and discuss what you have just read :)
Then review the 3 preceding articles in this series starting with Where To Start, then Sit Down Discussion and then Progression of Discipline

If you've already reviewed the first three, the next in the series is: Defining The TiH List / Introducing The DDiary